Boyd for President in 2012
Because change is hard.
If Boyd is President he will:
- Make all boob jobs tax deductible. We need to get the wrong boobs out of Washington and the right boobs into your house!
- Not raise taxes on single moms. I'll stay out of your pockets. But I will still try to get in your pants.
- Legalize marijuana. Tax and it make a fortune like we do with booze. Put the Mexican druglords and gang bangers out of business.
- Make welfare recipients pass a drug test. People that work have to. People that don't DEFINITELY should. If you have money for drugs of any kind, you don't need government help.
- Make sure that if you are on welfare, you can't vote. You wanna pull the lever, start pulling a paycheck. If you qualify for aid you can get bags of rice, oatmeal, beans and dried milk. That's it. You want pizza, beer or ice cream, get a job.
- If you have money for tattoos, cigarettes, video games or cable TV, you don't need any government help. Period. Fat, lazy, stupid people are ruining this country.
- Cut off aid to countries that hate our guts. You don't buy more drinks for some chick who just threw one in your face (unless she's smoking, smoking hot).
- Tell the United Nations to practice safe sex and go fuck themselves.
- Make sure The White House is a place for respectful intercourse. Did I say intercourse???? Oops..... I meant discourse.
- Bring our troops home from Iraq and Afghanistan and put them on the Mexican border......with orders to shoot invaders. Great practice for them and they'll be closer to home. A nation without true borders is no longer a nation.
- Make voters show an ID when they vote. You have to show an ID to drink shitty beer at my bar don't you? Well then you certainly should have to when voting.
- Allow people to start their own retirement account with the money they normally put into Social Security. The government just wants that money so they can keep spending it. You know what's in the Social Security trust fund? Nothing. They spent it already. Washington not only spends your money, they STEAL it too. Let's stop giving it to them.
If you disagree with any of these things, you are WRONG.
Boyd believes the following things rhyme with BULLSHIT:
- ethanol subsidies
- green jobs
- farm subsidies
- affirmative action
- stimulus funds
- electric cars
- Department of Agriculture
- Department of Education
- Undocumented Aliens
- 99 weeks of unemployment benefits
- Barnie Frank
- government unions
- Rocket Scientist (B.S. Aerospace Enginnering, U. of Minnesota, 1984)
- MBA, Loyola Univ. of Chicago, 1989
- Bar owner (the world famous Sardine Can)
- Lifelong bachelor (you don't have to tell me I'm lucky!!!)
- Schlitz drinker
- 6- handicap golfer
- Packer fan
- Schlitz drinker (I really like Schlitz)
- Born in the USA and can prove it!